I want to be with him
by LaughsOutRainbows
Summary: Sirius is going through depression when James shows up and Solves it all. : I hope you like. I wrote all that in like... twenty minutes. Its like midnight here, So I'm goin to bed xD night, Please review! It'd mean a lot to me :


"I'm not special…" Sirius was standing in front of the bathroom mirror. The door locked and his write covered in blood. "I'm not worth his time." Sirius took the razor again and cut another slit on his arm.

He heard a pop from the living room. "Shit…" He said under his breath. If James knew about this then James would surely send him to a Psych Ward.

"Sirius! I'm here!"Sirius was James' best friend. Sirius had always liked James more than a friend but figured James thought of them as brothers.

"Um... I'll be right there!" Sirius called panicky. He ripped a washcloth out of the bathroom closet and started wiping the blood stained wrist. Jolts of pain shot up his arm every time the washcloth touched a cut.

"Sirius? Where are ya, mate?" James sounded like he was going down the hallway.

"In the bathroom, I'll be out in a minute." James started to turn the door handle but it was locked.

The sink was still red, and so was his arm. That's when Sirius realized he was using a white washcloth. He mentally face palmed himself when he heard James' voice coming from outside the door in a murmur.

Sirius froze when James opened the door. James saw all the blood. "Sirius…" James said calmly. Sirius looked at James, scanning his face. His eyes were wide but his mouth was closed; He sounded calm but his body was shaking.

"Yeah…?" Sirius' voice was barley a whisper.

"Why did you do this…?"

"I… You… I had to…" Sirius looked back at his arm and started wiping it again.

"That… That's… That's not a good excuse Sirius."

"It's not an excuse…" Sirius got the washcloth wet and started to clean more blood.

"Oh?" James sounded like he got himself together again. "Then why did "you have to"?" He put quotation marks around 'you have to'.

"Because… I needed the pain to go away…" James grabbed Sirius' cut arm, hard, and held it up.

"You think this gets rid of the pain? IT DOESN'T SIRIUS!" James felt tears forming in his eyes. He didn't feel friendship love anymore. It felt more like… relationship love.

"Well for me it does!" Sirius shouted back.

"What pain do you need to have gone away! You don't need to do this to yourself for some—" Sirius cut him off.

"THE PAIN THAT I CAN'T HAVE YOU!" Sirius gasped and threw his free hand up to his mouth. Sirius expected James to walk away and never speak to him again. But to his surprise, James pulled Sirius so their bodies were glued together and kissed him.

The kiss was deep and loving. The softness of James' lips felt wonderful against Sirius'. Sirius put the cut arm down and wrapped his free hand around James' waist.

Sirius wasn't going to fight with what James wanted. James put both his arms around Sirius' neck, tangling his fingers in Sirius' hair.

A soft moan came from Sirius when James pushed him down to the floor so Sirius was sitting with his back to the bathtub and James on top of him, His left knee next to Sirius' groin. They pulled away only a little so they could take a deep breath.

Sirius opened his mouth and snaked his tongue out and licked James' bottom lip. James opened his mouth welcomingly.

Sirius and James had made their tongues move around together for a bit before pulling away from each other.

Both boys were breathless.

"James… Why'd you…?"

"Oh, don't complain. You liked it, that's all that mattered." James smiled devilishly then pecked Sirius quickly before getting to his feet.

"What about Lily?" James looked over his shoulder at Sirius.

"We broke up." James smiled then walked out. "Oh, Siri," Sirius was surprised by his new pet name, but love it.

"Yes?" James popped his head around the corner again.

"Use that spell we used to use when we were in fourth year." They exchanged smiles then departed. Sirius couldn't help but love this day.

"Hey… Prongs?" James walked back to the bathroom.

"Yeah?"

"Are we… uh… er going out?" James smiled devilishly.

"Of course we are. I wouldn't have had that much passion if we were just friends." James turned back and walked to the living room.

Sirius' stomach was flip-flopping. He did the spell James and he used to do in fourth year, to heal cuts. Only one more year of school before they could be together again.

Alone in Bliss and love…


End file.
